Author: Jeremy Clarke

In Canada a federal election is on the horizon, and the prospects are looking decidedly bad. The Liberals (big “L”) are down because they did some bad things and everyone is angry. Our two right-wing parties (the ALLIANCE and the PROGRESSSIVE CONSERVATIVES, completely whack and just bad respectively) have joined power-rings to make the mysteriously even MORE right-wing CONSERVATIVE (big “C”) party.

See, normally the liberals win a lot, do something bad, and the tories (prog. cons.) take over for a few years before the liberals take it back. Not ideal but reasonable, and the PC has always shown restraint and at least remained Canadian in shape and direction.

But the New Right does not guarantee even that. They want to make Canada the quainter United-States, boasting policies that even the previous leader of the Progessive Conservatives, Joe Clarke, has said constitute a “scary vision of canada”.
I of course will be voting for the NDP (New Democratic Party, the Left), who have mysteriously and amazingly chosen a friend of mine as the representative for my riding (of course, the Liberals will win here, guaranteed, but the thought is still nice). The NDP will not win the government though, despite their niceness, largely because they have done seemingly reckless things when they’ve taken control of provinces.

So we are left with the Liberals, normally dead center of the question (for Canada. They would of course constitute revolutionaries were they 200km to the south) but lately a bit right, and the Conservatives, terrifyingly right and threatening to have far too much power because of the general anger towards the economically philandering Liberals. A scary thing.

All this to get to the real point, being that for my current employment I have been calling people in the Carribbean, asking for them by name, and trying to make them do a survey, and yesterday I talked to someone in Jamaica who’s name was Stephen Harper, which is the same as the name of the leader of the Conservatives, and he was a big freakin’ jerk.

Which of course is unquestionable proof that people named Stephen Harper, internationally and pan-continentially, are big freakin’ jerks.

And I hate them.

For those of you who were curious as to what Vonnegut you should be reading, he has written a short and good article that seems to sum up nicely a lot of what he thinks. You can read it here.

Also, Rodeohead, which is exactly what it sounds like. The only downfall is that there is only one track of this post-bluegrasstronica goodness available. The good news is that it incorporates all your whiny college-rock favorites. (via BoingBoing, link to site and mp3.)

1. Evolution is over. We are currently taking care of everyone that happens to get born and making sure that they do not get un-born. We refuse to let anyone die, no matter how weak, as that would be unfair. Thus the weak keep on keeping on, instead of dying and making room for the strong.

(a) Furthermore, we encourage and aid them in their quest to accomlish that trick of tricks, procreation, effectively sewing the seeds of destruction within our genetic makeup (shallowing the gene-pool so to speak).

(b) This would be a serious bummer were it not for the fact that regardless of our level of natural selection and evolution, we will all be dead because of resource and cultural limits we face today long before any change could even theoretically take place.

[i]No longer a bummer, we can then see this lack of natural selection for what it really is, a kick in the pants for a world full of humans on the verge of something far more efficient, spectacular and mind blowing. Our assured and imminent destruction serves not only to render the question of oldschool evolution defunct, it is also caused by something that will allow the true possibilities in humanity to flourish.

( c) Technology opens many doors for us, and infinitely more for those that will come after us. Within our lifetimes we will face decisions concerning the destiny of our bodies, our minds and our species. We will see our inner and outer worlds being altered to suit the needs we will face. Pharmaceuticals, cogniceuticals, gene-therapy, genetic enhancement, bionic enhancement, all will come into their own to varying degrees. Technological enablement.

2. Would you take a pill that made you smarter for a limited amount of time? That allowed you the clarity and focus of mind to read the most difficult book, or the freedom of communication between cerebral hemispheres to truly come into contact with your intuition?

(a)
When this becomes a serious option would you actually be able to say no? Would you choose sluggishness? Ignorance? Regression? Would you keep smoking pot on the weekend?

(b)Would you deny this of future generations?

[i] Is there anything wrong with that?

Went to see The Passion of The Christ for 6$ at the discount cinema out of a morbid sense of obligation. I had heard again and again that it was one of the most gory and horrible films to ever come out of america (unlike Japan), but such claims just can’t sink in properly until you’ve watched a raging Roman guard rip chunks out of the side of Your Favorite Communist with some horrible metal-hooked cat ‘o nine tails.

I doubt that I’ve squirmed so much at one movie in my life.

Overall though the emotion was actually pretty solid, and some of the characterization was superb (the Simon character was particularly poingnant), though I’m not really sure about the writing.. I mean, it was a bit obvious, wasn’t it? I totally knew what everyone in the movie was going to say before they even said it!

There is a tiny place inside my head where I have been hiding to avoid being there when I call people to do surveys all day long, which is what I have been doing since school ended.

Uneventfully, there is very little in this tiny space, and the United-Statsers who I have been calling make it in far too often. (to any unitedstatsers in the audience do not feel insulted, I understand that you are barraged by telephonic solicitations, I merely hate to be among them)

Queerly enough, today was the day when my dignity was stolen from me by a tv prank crew from Just For Laughs. It was a sketchy, pretty unfunny, and ultimately botched joke about doing a survey for Health Canada and going to have the final questions asked by a doctor in the next room, which seems to the trickee to be a bathroom where the angry doctor is performing and act of defecation. Of course, they sent me too early, and I just saw an empty doctorless room, so they had to stall me and send me back, which faded the gag a tad.

I would show you a picture of these ridiculous people, but my batteries were completely dead. my creation depends on portable electricity.

You should be reading a book by Kurt Vonnegut, I have been doing it for years, and have never once been left unsatisfied.

Novels by kurt vonnegut are better than sex in that regard at least.